My Fiancé Claimed I Shouldn’t Wear a White Dress to Our Wedding and Suggested Red Instead — His Reason Flabbergasted Me

Ryan and I had been together for six years and engaged for the last eight months. We met when I was 21, and he had just turned 20. It was a sweet, young love that grew steadily into what I thought was unshakeable.

In reality? Not so much…

I took on most of the wedding planning, while Ryan only chimed in now and then. He is a photographer, so the only thing he really got involved in was ideas about lighting and overall aesthetics, so I figured he just wanted the wedding photos to look cool.

But when he casually suggested that I shouldn’t wear a white dress, I didn’t think much of it at first.

“It might look boring,” he said one evening, scrolling through wedding blogs on his phone.

“What?” I asked, unsure that I heard the correct thing.

“What if you wore something bold like… red?” he asked.

Red?

It caught me off guard, but I laughed it off, thinking that it was just one of Ryan’s quirky, random ideas.

“I’ve always pictured myself in a stunning white dress,” I said. “It’s classic, and it’ll make the photos pop against the greenery at the venue. Don’t you think so?”

Ryan just shrugged.

“I just think red would suit you better.”

His tone was light, almost too light. Like somehow, he wasn’t taking it seriously or just didn’t want to.

I should have pressed him right then, but I didn’t. I mean, it was just a color, right? I assumed he was being playful, or maybe trying to surprise me with some trendy wedding ideas.

It felt harmless at the time, so I brushed it off. But I tried to imagine myself in a red wedding dress.

But over the next few weeks, that harmless suggestion started to feel like a demand.

“I’m telling you what I want, Christina,” he said. “It’s not that big a deal. Aren’t you supposed to include me in all your decisions for the wedding?”

“I… yes and no, Ryan,” I began, not sure how to speak to him without throwing my cup of coffee across the room.

“I’ve shared everything with you except my outfit. And you’ve done the same thing. You’ve only mentioned the color of your tie.”

“That’s not the same, and you know it,” he said, huffing out the door.

Two weeks before the wedding, I finally bought the dress. It was a beautiful, fitted white gown with lace detailing along the sleeves.

I was thrilled.

I couldn’t wait to see Ryan’s face when I walked down the aisle. But when I told him I’d chosen my dress, his expression shifted.

He didn’t smile.

Instead, he sat down at the kitchen table while I cut into some lamb for dinner.

“Is it white?” he demanded.

“Yes, of course it’s white!” I replied happily, mixing thyme into butter. I was still riding the high of having finally found my dress.

Ryan’s jaw tightened, and I could see a flicker of something in his eyes.

Disappointment? Frustration?

Whatever it was, it felt like a slap. My joy and excitement began to deflate quickly.

“Why would you do that, Chris?” he asked flatly.

I blinked, confused.

“Because it’s a wedding, Ryan. Brides wear white.”

He shook his head, the irritation simmering just below the surface now.

“Not all brides. I’m telling you again, Christina. You shouldn’t wear white.”

I stared at him, trying to make sense of the situation. This wasn’t just about him being artistic or weird about color palettes anymore.

This was something else. There was more to this. I was sure of it.

“Why not?” I asked, sticking the lamb into the oven. With that out of the way, I could focus on what he was saying.

“What’s the big deal about wearing a white dress, Ryan?” I asked.

He let out a heavy sigh like he was getting ready for something.

A fight?

“Brides wear white to symbolize purity, do they not?” he said slowly, each word cutting deeper than the last. “But Chris, let’s face it, you’re not… pure, are you? So, you shouldn’t wear it.”

For a moment, I genuinely thought I had misheard him. I actually laughed. But when I saw his face, I sobered up immediately.

“Wait. Are you being serious?” I gasped.

He crossed his arms and looked away, his jaw clenched in that stubborn way I’d seen only a handful of times in our relationship.

“Yes, I’m serious,” he said. “It wouldn’t feel right. People will assume things.”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Honestly, who was this man, and what had he done with my Ryan?

“Assume what? That I had a boyfriend before I met you? Or that I actually enjoyed living my life before you? What is this, the 1800s?”

His gaze flickered back to mine.

“It’s just tradition,” he muttered, but it was clear that the excuse felt weak, even to him. “My sister mentioned it, and I cannot get it out of my head. It is what it is.”

Anger bubbled up inside me.

“Ryan, we’ve been together for six years. We live together. We’ve been on holiday together. You’re not exactly ‘pure’ either.”

He flinched but stayed stubbornly quiet.

It was like he thought his point made perfect sense, even as the words burned between us like wildfire.

I couldn’t stop myself.

“If that’s how you feel, you should wear red, too,” I snapped.

That’s when this man did the most ridiculous thing I’d ever seen. He ran to get himself some backup.

By fetching his mother.

While he was out of the house, I ate my dinner. I couldn’t care less what Ryan and Judith were about to throw my way. Instead, I was going to eat my lamb chops and salad, hoping that the act of eating would dim my anger.

When they came back, Ryan slammed the door, letting me know that he was still in his mood.

The three of us sat in our tiny living room, me with my arms folded tightly across my chest, Ryan sulking like a child, and his mother looking just as bewildered as I was.

When he explained the situation, she gave him a look that could wither a tree.

“Ryan,” she said slowly. “This is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. If you think Christina shouldn’t wear white, then you shouldn’t either. I didn’t raise you to have double standards like this.”

I didn’t think that Judith would be on my side. I was sure that she would have sided with him and his sister. But seeing her as bewildered as I was made me feel better.

Poor Ryan flushed with embarrassment, but it only made him dig his heels in deeper.

“It’s different for guys. That’s why you two just don’t understand.”

I could feel the last shred of my patience slipping away.

“How is it different?” I asked. “Please, explain this logic to me, Ryan.”

Judith nodded and sat back further.

But there was no logic to it. It was just insecurity and a twisted need to control a moment that should’ve been about love. His mother shook her head, disgusted.

I could see it in her eyes.

Even Judith could see that her son was ruining something special.

Ryan, however, wouldn’t back down. He was being ridiculously obstinate.

“People will judge us, Mom,” he insisted, as if the opinions of imaginary guests mattered more than the woman he claimed to love.

I felt sick.

It wasn’t just about my dress anymore. It was about what it represented. Ryan didn’t just care about appearances. He cared about control.

And worse, he cared about how others might see me more than how I felt on our wedding day.

“You’re ruining everything, Ryan,” I said. “You’re breaking my heart.”

Judith squeezed my knee.

And what did Ryan do?

He scoffed. Actually scoffed.

That argument changed everything. I didn’t just feel angry — I felt betrayed.

Six years of love and trust were shattered under the weight of Ryan’s unreasonable insecurity.

I thought we’d moved past all of this. It was an issue in the past. Ryan and his lingering jealousy about my ex, the tiny, petty arguments about my past. All of it suddenly came rushing back like a flood.

I thought we were building a future together, not dragging old baggage into it.

But there it was.

Ryan wasn’t the man I thought he was.

Two days later, I made the hardest decision of my life. I called off the wedding.

Ryan begged me to reconsider.

“Wear what you want! It doesn’t matter, Christina! Nothing matters more than you. Please, our big day is coming. It’s so close. Forget about all of this… please.”

But it was too late.

The damage was done. I couldn’t un-see what I’d seen, the cracks in our relationship that I had ignored over the years. I didn’t notice how controlling Ryan was. And how he had clung to the outdated ideas about who I should be.

I moved out that same weekend. I packed up my things, left the wedding dress hanging in the back of the closet and drove to my sister’s apartment.

It’s been a few months since I broke off the engagement, and I’m finally starting to feel like myself again. The bonus was that I got refunded for most of the wedding deposits.

The funniest part?

When I told my sister the whole story, she laughed.

“You should wear red to your next date, babes,” she laughed. “Just to get a good laugh out of it.”

And honestly? I just might.

Because the final years of my twenties were about living and enjoying life. And that’s what I was going to do.

What would you have done?

If you’ve enjoyed this story, here’s another one for you:

Wedding Boutique Worker Shamed Me for Being Pregnant — Karma Got Her in Less than 10 Minutes

Anna’s dream wedding was nearly destroyed by a cruel remark about her pregnancy, but what happened next left her speechless. In the face of humiliation, an unexpected twist transformed her most vulnerable moment into a triumph no one could have anticipated.

I stood in front of the mirror, my heart racing with excitement as I gently caressed my growing belly. This was it—the moment I had dreamed about for so long. After everything Mark and I had been through, I was finally pregnant.

Now, I could start planning our wedding. I couldn’t stop smiling as I looked at myself in the white gown. It was simple yet elegant, with lace details that made me feel like a princess. Everything felt so perfect.

“This is really happening,” I whispered to myself, my voice trembling with joy. I imagined walking down the aisle, Mark waiting for me at the altar, his eyes filled with love as they always were.

The thought filled me with warmth and anticipation.

Read the full story here.

This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.

The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.